Daily Archives: August 21, 2008

Friday Night Lights

 She strikes the match,

Her concentration as intense as the flame.

As the candle wicks flare

Her heart fills with joy.

She glances at the candles

Mini fires flickering together

She feels her soul overflow

Due to the happiness within.

She draws the flames

Closer to her, with both hands,

In the way of the age old tradition.

She covers her eyes and

She begins to pray;

For the safety of her children,

For their continued success in life,

For the health of the extended family,

And for her people at large.

She includes a special prayer

For the aged and the sick

And at this most holy of times

She whispers her most fervent wish.

That in the fullness of time

When the good Lord decides it’s right

That He will send her the person

To sing Eishet Chayil Friday nights.

A partner, a lover, a beloved best friend,

Someone to help her, nurture her,

Respect her and cherish her

A true soulmate, her real bashert.

She sets no physical parameters

In this, her heartfelt prayer,

She wishes only for peace and shalom,

She hopes He will help her get there.

One day she knows

She will light the same candles and

Pray the identical prayer

Then she will open her eyes

To find him standing right there.

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In Awe of Life (Bowing to pressure to repost…)

I never knew before

The power of a simple touch.

The merest whisper

Of your skin on mine

Made my senses spring to life.

That night on the beach

When we first met

The stars were in perfect alignment

The heavens smiling

Their approval on us.

I casually reached for your hand

And our worlds stood violently still.

The electricity leaped,

Shocking your heart and mine

Into stunned belief.

At that moment I knew,

I became yours and you mine.

The briefest hint of what could be

Gave me such hope,

The chance to dream

Of the miracle that could be us.

I gazed into your eyes

And felt your soul open itself up

And swallow mine whole.

 

Life can never be the same again.

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SOLITUDE

If wo/man is not meant to alone, then why is it so difficult to find the right “one”, and to keep him/her? I myself am single, I have a few friends who are in the same solitary state and it seems so many of our frustrations and so much of our anguish comes from being un-partnered. (Although I would rather be alone than be with the wrong one). Our lives are otherwise fulfilled – mine with my kids and my friends, my life is BH rich and full. Others have careers that drive them and keep them hopping. But most of us yearn for that special someone, that elusive person to share everything with. Someone to just be there for us unconditionally, and for us to return the being-there-ness. (I am tired, my words are not working as well as usual).

 

Apparently I am supposed to be happy that I was once married, that I had the chance at “true love” – now it is someone else’s turn, someone who has never been married. I have been told to take a back seat, not take a man who might marry someone who has never had kids. I guess my life is over in their eyes? I had my chance, it got messed up, so sad too bad.

 

I am just frustrated right now. There are things I love about being on my own – independence, not having to account for my movements (mind you the kids track me these days…..oy) but I would so love to have someone special in my life who would look at me the way my grandparents still looked at each other after 50 years of marriage. I want that. I want that deep and abiding love that transcends time, place and everything else. Am I fooling myself that I can find that again? Should I just quit while I am ahead?