Most women have best friends, ones they talk to about their deepest darkest fears, about their hopes and dreams, those stories that they can’t really tell anyone else, but they know their BFF will totally understand. Our BFFs know, without being reminded, that everything we share is not for public consumption.
But, what if you or your BFF are married? Is it fair to ask the BFF not to share information with the spouse? Or should one expect a married couple to share everything?
My rule of thumb is as follows. Spouses need to share most things – keeping secrets is bad for a relationship. BUT there are some BFF confidences that spouses really do not need to know. If one has shared some bedroom problems, or some very personal health issue, or an upcoming surprise for a spouse – those are ok secrets to keep.
Most of the time I imagine that whatever I share will get shared with the husbands – even if it probably isn’t. I don’t want to be the person telling my best friend that she cannot tell her husband what I told her. I don’t want to be the cause of marital discord. In the same vein, I think my BFFs know there is a likelihood of me sharing stuff with my hub. (Truth be told tho, I have other things to talk about with the KoD – we don’t sit there and dish about everyone.)
What do you think? Do you share everything with your spouse? Should you?