Frumster Files – #78545


A FaceBook Friend of mine, let’s call him Yitz, put this up as his status update.


Would you date this woman? From Frumster: “This is what I am looking for in a mate: A quirky, thoughtful and sensitive man who is comfortable dating a woman who has dated both men and women in the past.”


I wanted to know your thoughts – the discussion on his FaceBook page was very lively.

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11 responses to “Frumster Files – #78545

  1. I just wonder what the point of that confession is — why does the general population need to know who she dated previously, unless she’s specifically looking for someone to swing with (and it seems to me that frumster isn’t the place to look for this!).

    Many frum people have pasts that aren’t totally “kosher”. The point isn’t where you’ve been, but where you are now and where you are going, IMO.

  2. maybe the point is honesty, full disclosure and all? she doesn’t want to keep it a secret that might hurt her date if he found out when they were well into the relationship? i dunno.

    if it were the other way around – a guy saying he dated men and women, there is NO way I would even look at his profile twice.

  3. lady lock and load

    There may be men who have dated men and women themselves and wouldn’t mind dating her. A guy who never dated another guy may not be interested at all.

  4. I dunno. It seems to me that full disclosure should come once you know a person, not quite so publicly. Honestly, I’m surprised frumster is allowing this at all. It just seems like the wrong…forum…for sharing this information.

  5. you know Frumster says that it checks all the profiles, but it cannot be true because there are so many profiles that are so inappropriate.

  6. Maybe she has been burned too many times by guys who heard the truth later in the game… I don’t necessarily see anything inappropriate in writing what she wrote.

    Would I date her? I don’t know. But I can imagine that there are guys who would think that maybe she has a friend who might join them for a manage a trois…

  7. MO-tech – i was going to say “this is FRUMster you know” – but sadly, that makes no difference as you and i both know.

  8. You have to wonder what kind of person would be attracted to this. Being that many horny men are turned on by the idea of girl on girl, she will be lining herself up not for love, but for lust.
    Also, CHOOSE ONE!! IF you have come to point where you are interested in dating for Marriage, (which is the intention of Frumster, BTW) then you have chosen a lifestyle. Go with it!

  9. The fact that this can be posted and discussed so freely on this guys FB page, and here, tells us something about the times we live in….

  10. I think I am with Mo-tech, she might have been burned so many times that she just wants it out there from the start. Kudos to her for having the balls to be so upfront.

  11. I agree with Baila.

    It doesn’t sound right for someone to share that publicly for everyone to see.

    I think no matter what a person did, if they are in a deep serious relationship with another person, then their past shouldn’t be held against them. I think it’s only when people reach a deep connection then they are able to overlook it. But if somebody puts it on their profile for the public, it just doesn’t look right.

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