I am a walkerholic. I walk walk walk. Before breakfast and after dinner. Religiously. Tonight I was accompanied by two of the little people. (ok lets be real, by one little person and one who once was little but now isn’t).
We walked to the local park, littlest dude wanted to blow his bubbles.
We got to the park and were moseying around the fake lake to almost stumble upon a mommy duckie with seven baby duckings. We watched them for about 20 minutes. In the water, out of the water. Mommy trying to keep track of all the babies and honking at people who got too close to her babies. It was fascinating, but what was more fascinating was to watch the boys following the ducks, watching them in awe. You would never think to see this in the midst of our urban jungle. Those that didn’t join us for our walk because they wanted to watch a movie totally missed out.
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I have heard lately of several stories where people have been encouraged, by shadchanim (matchmakers) and rabbis, to flat out lie when they talk to a potential shidduch (date) or fill out a shidduch resume or fill out an online dating profile.
Photographs that are 10 years old, shaving 5-10 years off one’s age, not admitting to being a grandparent (for those people dating second time around, perhaps as young as 40…) are among the few things I have heard. Don’t mention you were ever sick, don’t say you are or have been on medication, don’t mention the tattoos, don’t mention that you served time in jail or have been married more than once.
I don’t know if I agree. I know that in the second time around dating scene finding someone is that much harder, and once you have been around the block you are generally schlepping pretty hefty baggage with you anyway. If your hair is grayer, and you have put on weight, I can see wanting to use an older picture – but it’s misrepresenting yourself. Your date will meet you and realize straight away that he/she has been misled.
I know there are some sensitive topics that need to only be discussed once there is a real possibility that a relationship can be established – but age? Grandchildren? These are fundamentals.
How can you start off what can potentially be a life together, with a lie?
I had a real goosebump moment this morning, and I wanted to share it with you. (KoD please don’t get mad that I didn’t tell you when it happened – I am fine and you would only have worried about me for the rest of my drive home. I am telling you now, so that counts, right?)
So I left the house at about 8:15 this morning and by 8:30 was tootling along the thruway trying valiantly not to shed the tears brimming in my eyes at the thought of again being parted from the KoD. I stopped to fill up with gas just before exit 16 and carried on.
Once I pass exit 16 I usually say Tefillat Haderech – the prayer to keep travelers safe. I have said it so often that I know it by heart by now.
There are a lot of trucks on the thruway and one always has to be extremely aware of them, because of their size, if they make a mistake it could have terrible consequences.
I had just finished saying Tefillat Haderech when I noticed a humongous truck moving up to pass me. Fine. Pass me. You are bigger. It’s ok. The truck hadn’t even passed me when he started veering into my lane. I had that terrible feeling of dread rise up in the back of my throat. Of course I blasted him with my horn while slamming on the brakes, not too severely as there was a car behind me, but luckily he saw what was going on and also braked. It seemed to take forever for the trucker to get the message (if he even got it), and life just went slow motion. I was so scared. All I could think about was what would my loved ones do if I G-d Forbid got hurt.
He ended up missing my front bumper (fender?) by mere inches. I think it took a full 15 minutes for my heart to slow down to normal. I didn’t stay behind this yutz for too long, I was just too scared of what might happen next. I passed him as soon as I could but the whole rest of the way I was almost paranoid every time I passed a truck or a truck passed me.
I truly believe in the timing of my prayer. Had I not said Tefillat Haderech when I did, …..I cannot even finish that sentence. I don’t think the trucker even realized that he almost caused an accident. Sometimes I wonder if they shouldn’t just make separate highways just for trucks.
Baruch Hashem – Thank G-d no one was hurt. That’s the main thing.
Driving along today listening to the radio I heard an advertisement for the same radio station – looking for someone to work behind the scenes. They asked to send in a CV and salary requests, and a photo. What on earth do they need the photo for? a) it’s RADIO – not TV, no one sees you, and b) its behind the scenes stuff – who cares what you look like, and c) isn’t that leaving themselves open to a discrimination case – you didn’t choose me because you didn’t like my photo / the colour of my skin / my mismatched eyes etc…
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