Daily Archives: April 18, 2010

Music in Sefirah

Can someone explain to me why it is totally frowned upon to listen to music during sefirah, yet acapella is ok?

I am sure many of you have heard of the awesome acapella Jewish group Six13. They are awesome singers who use no instruments other than their voices. The boys and I have their CDs as part of our pre-Shabbat mix-tape that motivates us to clean up before Shabbat, and we bop along to that just as much as to the 80s tracks on our mix tape. But them I can listen to in sefirah, but Madonna – no way.

Can someone explain?

(for GL because she asked so nicely)

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Mikvah Survey

How much does your local mikvah charge you?

Have you ever tipped the balanit / mikvah lady? How much? (I never heard of tipping the balanit until I read something about it this week. Kinda shocked!)

Between 1 to 5 (1 being awful and 5 being great) rate your average mikvah experience.

Have anything extra to add?

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WWYD – schoolboys

My son’s class is allowed to order pizza from the local kosher pizza place on Rosh Chodesh. This is not something that the school arranges, but something that they have to organize on their own. Usually they decide together and a phone call goes out to all of them to bring money to school so they can enjoy the pizza / poutine the next day.

Last week apparently there was a phone call that went out to everyone in the class except for 3 boys, one of whom was my son. The boy who did the calling just decided not to call these 3 kids for reasons that he had not wanted to explain.

These 3 boys came to school without pizza money. By the time they realized that they had been excluded it was too late for them to go home or call home to get money, and they ended up demoralized and sad, eating their “boring” lunches in the cafeteria while the rest of the class yummed it up in the classroom.

When they asked the boy who arranged it all why he didn’t call them, his answer was “I just didn’t”. In my book, this was mean. Why deliberately exclude these kids? The boy had the numbers for the whole class, he has called here before many times for the same reason.

My son doesn’t want me to do anything. He didn’t even want to complain to his rebbe / teacher. But he was very hurt. WWYD?

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Positivity Sucks

Being positive is one of the hardest things to be sometimes. After Monday’s upset, and the KoD leaving on Tuesday, I had a serious talk with myself, and made myself leave the wallowing and pity parties behind, and focus on the good, and look to the future. I even bought into it for a day or two.

Since Friday morning I have been fighting a severe case of the blahs. Maybe it is just the usual cruddiness of being far from the KoD. Maybe it’s uncertainty for this whole immigration thing. Maybe it’s lack of decent sleep – when I do sleep I am riddled with anxiety dreams. Maybe it’s just everything all rolled into one huge ball.

I am trying so hard to stay positive especially for the kids. This has been a long hard road and we are almost at the end of it. I am just so plain tired of it all. I just want to be with my KoD and never have to say goodbye again. I want to get on with the rest of my life.

Right now apparently my body (my mind?) needs to be in a foul rotten mood. It needs to ignore the phone, and be anti-social, it needs to not be with people. The weird thing is that I am well aware I am in this mood, I am well aware that it sucks for everyone around me, but I cannot seem to dig out of it. Maybe I just need to hunker down and ignore the world until I am in a better place emotionally. Probably safer for everyone that way.

But that is a slippery slope. And it isn’t fair to those who care about me to be ignored. I do not often indulge these feeling sorry for myself moods – I know better than to let them consume me. I cannot seem to stop it this time. Sigh.

I hate feeling like this. When the KoD is with me, he makes me feel stronger. He banishes all the bad stuff just by being present. My positivity returns with a vengeance. Maybe I just have had enough of trying to be strong by myself. Maybe I am fed up of being on my own even though I have an awesome husband (who lives 333 miles away)? Maybe, just maybe, I have gotten to the point that I am totally fed up with all the bureaucracy – it has been 14 months since we married and started the whole process.

I know it is just paperwork. I know that BH we all have our health and a roof over our heads and food in our belly. I know I have to do my Hishtadlut (due diligence) and get the paperwork in order (again). It’s all in the process. It’s far from impossible and will get done. So why, why when it is only paperwork and everything else is ok, am I so down in the dumps?

I need to go for a long walk…..333 miles long to be precise….

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