I came across this scenario on a message board that I frequent and was wondering what my readers would have to say about it. Personally I think this is heinous, but I don’t know what I would do to make the mother understand how much her behaviour bothered me. What do you think?
My mother, who I have always had a difficult relationship with though it’s been at least better in recent years, came over to visit this afternoon, said she was taking my 2 year old daughter grocery shopping with her, but actually took her for a haircut.
She did not ask me today if she could. She did ask me at least a dozen times over the past few months though and each time I said emphatically NO!
I hate the haircut, but that’s the least of it. I am furious with this violation of trust. I told my mother straight out I was angry, she just grinned from ear to ear and said over and over to nobody in particular how fantastic my little girl looks now. I am so filled with rage. Yes, it’s just hair. Yes, it will grow back. I know that.
I wanted to be the one to take my precious little girl for her first haircut and now that has been stolen from me. Okay, even that is not the end of the world. We will have other firsts and special times. But the bottom line is my mother has proven herself to be someone whom I simply cannot trust at all and who simply does not give a hoot about my feelings. The smug look on her face when she walked out of here today absolutely turned my stomach. I don’t know what more to say to her, or what to do. She doesn’t care. Now here it is a couple hours before Shabbat and all I can do is sit here shaking with rage and hurt. She was planning to come over and visit tomorrow. I feel like latching the door and not letting her in.