Bumped into a friend today at the store. A friend who I knew for years in Montreal and now lives down here in Spring Valley. I have to tell you, it is so nice to bump into someone I know at the store. Sometimes I just feel so obviously NEW here. So this was welcome!
Anyway, she wanted to introduce me to someone she was with, and she said “this is my friend Hadassah ExsLastName”. She knew me for years by that name and even though she knows I am now remarried, maybe she didn’t know my new married name. So I actually said to the other person, “My name is Hadassah Milner now, nice to meet you”. I didn’t mean to make my friend uncomfortable, and I told her after that I wasn’t insulted that she used my former married name, but that my name is Milner now, and I am proud to use it.
On reflection, maybe I should have said something to her afterwards, not in front of her friend, but thing is, if I was going to meet this other person again, she’d remember my name as something different.
My friend seemed to be ok with it, apologized, I told her it wasn’t necessary – the schools sometimes slip up, although down here they really make an effort to get it right, but the kids friends call me Mrs ExLastName until my boys point out to them that we have a different last name. Getting heated about it is a waste of energy.
So, was I wrong? Did I handle this situation ok? What should I have said / done?