Daily Archives: November 18, 2010

Pajamas Belong at Home!!

Otherwise known as what the heck is with people these days?! I took the boybies to the library to load up on reading material for the long Friday night ahead. There were three adults there in pajamas. (One grown man was even wearing jammy pants with snowmen on them. Shudder!!) I am used to seeing little kids being shlepped to the library just before the 9pm closing in their jammies. But grown ups? I have seen PJs being worn in the supermarket too. It used to be that no one ever knew what you wore to go to sleep in, but these days it seems acceptable to go from bed to store to doctor’s office to library, perhaps even to work, and then back to bed in the same clothes. Euw.

I love PJs. I do. I love to curl up in my jammies under my warm comforter to read. At home. In my bed. Where pajamas belong.

Next we are going to see people travelling on airplanes in the pajamas – remember the days when people got all dressed up to fly?

Gosh I sound old. Pass the geritol!!

WWYD – teaching material

Let’s say your grade school child brings home a newsletter from his class, written by the teacher, and you find a typo such as the one shown below. What do you do? Do you ignore it? Do you wonder why the English teacher could not take two seconds to spell check the document? Do you circle it in red and send it back with your child, with a note saying you expect better?

WWYD?

Accountability

One of the up-sides of being a single mom was the lack of having to account to anyone for anything. Well, yes, I do have kids, but they were not going to criticize how I spent my time or my money so long as they had everything they needed.

I knew what my budget was for everything, I knew my bank balance to the last penny. I knew what was going in to the bank and what ridiculously high percentage of that was going out to pay bills etc.

If I wanted to buy a pair of high heeled hot pink suede knee high boots that were on sale for a ridiculous price – if I could afford it, there was nothing stopping me. Those boots walked on home with me and had pride of place in my shoe closet.

In my first marriage I had a housekeeping budget. So long as I kept within my budget any extra was mine to do with what I liked. However, with 4 little boys there was not usually any extra. When there were other purchases that needed to be made (or that were a luxury not a necessity) it had to be discussed.

So having the financial freedom to decide how to spend my money was a breath of fresh air. I enjoyed not having to answer to anyone.

Here I am now, married to the most wonderful man in the world, and I have to readjust my thinking about spending. Again. And I am realizing that I am not handling it well. I get defensive if I am asked how much something cost, even if it’s just a little something that cost $3! I take it personally, as a criticism, when all the KoD wants to know was how much it cost. There is no hidden agenda, just open curiosity. The KoD is an awesome shopper. He knows prices like the back of his hand. He knows when we are being overcharged and he knows when he sees a bargain. Especially when it comes to grocery shopping. Food is his business and he knows it well.

Yet bring up how much something cost, and my hackles rise. It isn’t fair to him. But three years of not having to account for a penny to anyone but myself – well, I got used to that. I need to stop getting so defensive – it’s not like I am this crazy over-spender that buys and buys and has filled the house with unnecessary stuff. I am not. The KoD knows exactly how careful I am with money – so I should know that any question is simply that, a question, not a criticism.

How do I get over this? (Honestly, folks, the KoD is the most patient man in the history of the world. Sometimes I wonder how in heaven’s name he puts up with me). Logically I understand what I need to do, but emotionally – well, that’s a whole nother story…. Do any of you who were formerly single-parents but now remarried identify with my story? How did you handle this kind of situation?

Home Work

I need to set myself up a home office. At the moment my work area consists of either the dining room table, or the kids’ homework / games table in the living room, at which I also fold the laundry.

I don’t have a room in the house that’s free for me to use solely for my own work purposes. I do have a small desk in our bedroom, but that allows me a tiny corner to work, and I like to spread out. Plus the bed keeps calling to me….as does the laundry on the bed that needs to be put away….

My 12 year old has his desk in a nook in the basement, and I thought of moving his desk into his room (that he shares) so that I could take over that space. But again, it is not a huge space, and I would need to maximize the potential of this little nook. And let’s not even think about how he would feel if I displaced him.

I thought of taking over a corner in the living room, but the house is so organized and tidy, that a desk with papers and files and stuff, especially if I am in middle of something, will just attract attention. I also don’t want my private work papers to be accessible to the children, but if I am working from home then I need to be accessible….

What home office solutions have worked for you?