Daily Archives: December 30, 2010

Divorcees shifting to the left

Oh How I love Hashkafa.com – usually I just roll my eyes and move on. But this is one of their posts this week and it does ring a bell.

I have noticed that many friends and acquaintances of mine (sadly there are many) who get divorced tend to shift to the left, halachically and hashkafically. Some of them are very gradual, some are immediate.

One friend started showing more hair, then removed her shaitel, then lowered her neckline, raised her hemline (mid-thigh length, for example), and now looks completely irreligious. She has not put on pants, yet, interestingly. She keeps shabbos, kosher, and stuff like that though.

Another friend took off her shaitel, put on pants, gave up her son to her husband without a fight, and is not religious AFAIK.

Another friend didn’t really move to the left, just *chilled* a bit and became slightly less stringent on certain halachos or chumros.

Is there something about a marriage gone wrong that pushes women to do this? Do other negative life changes cause this as well? Do widows act like this?

It seems like tznius is the first and major thing to go.

Has anyone noticed this? I find it really interesting.

I have found in my own personal experience that this is indeed the case. Many of the divorcees I know have had somewhat of a crisis of faith and have re examined where they want to be Jewishly. I know I did, I have written about it in the past. For me a lot of it was mourning – but I wonder what other women’s attitudes are towards religion after divorce, and why it seems to suffer afterwards.

Thoughts?

No 2010 Wrap Up Post

I know that in the past I have written an annual wrap up post, but this year I decided not to. This was an awesome year – one in which our family was reunited to live under one roof after a hard time of uncertainty and worry. Instead of looking back, I am going to look forward to the future, to being together with the KoD, to raising our children to fulfill their potentials, to celebrating many milestones in the future.

Here’s to a wonderful 2011 – Cheers!!

Tea for Two

(Florence, this is for you)

I spent part of this afternoon at the local kosher grocery with Florence, a good friend. We had some time left over after shopping and she invited me to join her for a cup of tea – a nod to my British roots. I informed my lovely friend that I don’t drink tea out of the house.

I explained that I am very particular about my tea – in fact, so particular, that I only drink tea that has been purchased in the UK and brought to me here. That is the only way I can ensure that my tea is strong enough and tastes the way I am used to it tasting.

Currently I am working my way through a huge box of PG Tips that my friend D brought me back last time he was in Old Blighty.

Nothing, absolutely NOTHING here in the States, or in Canada even comes close to making the same delicious brew. I have my standards, and I need my British Tea with a couple of digestive biscuits on the side.

So, sorry Florence, that I didn’t take you up on your offer, it wasn’t personal to you. It’s not you, it’s me and my tea peculiarities!!

Convicted of Rape

Moshe Katzav, Israel’s former President, was found guilty of rape today in an Israeli court. What I fail to understand, and perhaps someone can enlighten me, is how they convicted him and did not immediately remand him into custody until sentencing.

He committed and was found guilty of more than one heinous act, yet he got to go home like he did nothing wrong. Most men in most civilized countries would be remanded into custody until sentenced for these terrible crimes. Because he was the President, he gets to go free? There was no mention of bond, house arrest, nothing of the sort. What kind of sentence can we expect – a slap on the wrist?? Minimum sentence for rape in Israel is 4 years. Let’s see what the judge gives him…

Can someone please explain this?

Grumpaliciousness

Seriously, is there something that is in their DNA that makes (pre) teens so darn crabby in the morning?? What the heck do they have to be cranky about? They get food and shelter, clean clothes and a warm bed, love and affection, all their needs are met. So, they have to get out of bed before the sun has risen – I do too! I am up earlier than them, to set up the coffee and inhale a massive dose of snarkitol so that I can deal with them and you don’t hear me complaining (OK maybe you do, but that is my right as the mama bear).

Oh it is so darn tooting hard to be a young ‘un these days….Puhleeze….