Daily Archives: June 16, 2011

What’s that on your neck?

(Blogged with permission)

My Lenny was staying over at friends last night – school is finishing up, and the living is easy. He walked in just now – huge band aid on his neck.

Funny story, Ima, he says, fingering his band aid. It’s just a bruise.

Last night his friend was playing around with a paintball gun in the woods (don’t even get me started on that), thought it was empty and fired it in Lenny’s direction. A pellet hit him in the neck. Didn’t hurt, says my tough soon-to-be 16 year old.

He woke up this morning, and his friend’s  brother took one look at him and made some kind of comment about him having a fun night last night. My son, being oh so innocent (and don’t disabuse me of this notion because I will need to take a powder and lie down) told his friends that he failed to understand the comment. They explained to him that it looked like a hickey.

Ok at this point I burst into laughter. I mean, covering up a bruise with a band aid just so no one would think he had a hickey!! Everyone knows he doesn’t hang out with girls. (again, don’t disabuse me of this notion because I will need to take a powder and lie down). He’s a good yeshiva boy. But yeah, he has school tomorrow and it wouldn’t look good for him to walk into school with it – you know how teenaged boys are. But having the band aid draws attention to it.

As he is walking away he asks me – Ima, if I had told you it WAS a hickey would you have believed me? I pondered for a moment, and said “no”. He wasn’t sure if he should be flattered that I trust him or insulted that I think he doesn’t know any girls.

He doesn’t, right?

Who should pay?

It’s the end of the school year and the kids have many trips. To the lake, to the pizza shop – ten bucks here, ten there – it does add up.

My 8th grader is graduating and moving on to high school. (Give me a second, I am verklempt just thinking about it). His grade is being taken on a graduation trip where they will do stuff like white water rafting and rock climbing. I am so totally envious – I even asked him if they needed mommies to come.

Anyhow, this is a big trip, subsidized but still costing plenty of money. Not your ten dollar trip to the pizza store. I can’t not let him go – he has worked so hard this year, he has earned this trip, but yes, it’s tough on the wallet – especially with all the schools wanting the registration fees for the next academic year by the end of this week. (Oy to the vey on that).

My son, bless him, offered to pay something towards it because he knows that it’s a lot of money. I feel that he has no income, he has no way right now to replenish his bank account, and that was his barmitzvah money. He should keep it for something important.

I have been told by others that I should NOT pay for the whole trip and allow him to contribute. But when the boys go to the pizza store or the lake or the museum I give them the full whack. They don’t get allowance – it isn’t fair of me to expect them to cough up the money, right?

So what works in your house? Do you pay for all the trips? Do you give allowance and expect the kids to pay for everything out of that? How does it work? Talk to me, folks.