Tag Archives: coffee

Happy Mother’s Day, Now Bring Me Coffee….

It’s Mother’s Day. You are a guy. You wake up and your wife is snuggling herself up to you. Do you:

A)    Just hold her tight and tell her how special she is. OR

B)    Tell her to get out of bed and make you some %$#@ing coffee?

Sigh. Since the KoD and I got married almost 15 months ago, whenever he comes up to Montreal he refuses to make coffee. He is afraid of my swanky coffee machine. He is used to a plain percolator and my machine is a little fancier. He’s a smart man, for sure he could figure it out, but it isn’t worth the aggravation.

This morning, soon after we woke up, he suggested that I get up and make coffee, as we both need it. I looked at him, thinking he was totally joking. I mean, given the snuggling  situation and all – did he really want coffee that badly? Apparently he wasn’t joking. I threw back the covers in a huff, shrugged into my bath robe, and stomped off to the kitchen, throwing insults and epithets over my shoulder. “He’s a grown man and doesn’t know how to make his wife a cup of coffee. On Mother’s Day I have to make my own freaking coffee?!!” If there would have been a stiletto shoe lying around I probably would have tossed it at his head. The nerve!! I switched the lights on in the kitchen and blearily, angrily, reached for the coffee. Propped up against the swanky coffee maker that the KoD refuses to use there is a HUGE envelope that had “Happy Mother’s Day” written on it, in the KoD’s handwriting. The sneaky devil!!

I stomped back to the bedroom, yelling at him with a twinkle in my eye. I called him sneaky and mean and he was laughing his head off. I think I might have pummeled him a time or seven. It was the sweetest card ever – not that I cried or anything….

He loves playing tricks on me, my man, and I fall for them every single time. He so has my number.

A little while later he says to me “this isn’t going to be a blog post is it??”

Bookmark and Share

dear heart, fruit of my loins

I know you think you are a man and as such my rules dont apply to you. This morning’s events should show you how much you have to learn.

When I said you do not EVER touch my brand spanking new espresso machine EVER EVER, that is exactly what I meant.

 

I know you guys love the idea of having hot frothy milk with your hot cocoa, and I love to make it for you, MYSELF, as I know how to use the machine in the right way.

 

Your excuse that you didn’t wish to wake me doesn’t wash as you know I was already up. Your brother even told you what you were doing was wrong, but he’s only 9 so what does he know? Apparently a lot more that a boy on the cusp of teenagerhood.

 

See, in no espresso machine that I have seen does the milk go through the percolator. Every single time the milk is poured into the jug or cup and then frothed or steamed. You would know that if you ever bothered to be aware of your surroundings, instead of being constantly plugged in to your mp3 at ear splitting volume,

 

When you came to me in a panic, you made a good decision. Own up to what you did, and get it fixed. See the thing is it’s going to take me a good long time to get the burned milk out of the pipes in the espresso machine, a lot of time running boiling water through it, which also means I don’t get my coffee until I have fixed the machine.

 

Me, not getting my coffee – who suffers? Yes, surely I do, but I guess in a bigger way you suffer too. WHY? Am I a little crabby without my coffee in the mornings? Add to that the fiasco with my brand spanking new espresso machine and I am not a nice person to be around right now.

 

Dear heart, I love you but right now I want to boil your head, in my espresso machine, with coffee grounds shoved down your throat. That would do for starters. But because I am a good mother, I will just ignore you until I am caffeinated and then decide on a suitable consequence that sadly for me, will not include bodily harm.

 

Dear son, first-fruit of my loins, maybe one day you will realize that your old mother has a reason for saying what she does, and maybe you will realize that she is wise as well as beautiful. Oh and by the way telling me I look so pretty when you have just buggered up my espresso machine is a cheap shot and totally pissed me off. How the heck can I look pretty with yesterday’s mascara smudged over my under eyes, my hair a birds nest, my glasses half way down my nose, and a thunder cloud hovering over my head???? Flattery will not get you anywhere with me. No today anyway.

 

Now get thee to your room and start organizing and tidying and cleaning and no mp3 for you right now, and even worse, NO MORE BATTERIES for anything.

 

Signed

 

Your loving mother who remembers every minute of her long labour with you, every second of the two hours she spent pushing your big oversized head through her body, every freaking stitch they sewed me up with, every second of discomfort after birthing you. And yes it is my job to make you feel guilty over that, especially at times like this. This episode adds a couple of hours to the story of your birth, I think at this point I was in labour with you for 7 years………

Confessions of a Caffeine addict

 

I know, I know, I was doing so well. Yesterday I actually had 2 cups of coffee,Coffee_Lover but the KoD (bless him) bought me the Folgers coffee that is supposedly easier on the stomach –it’s called Simply Smooth (sounds like a body cream or summat)  – and it really works. The only reason I stopped drinking coffee was due to the stomach aches. So if I can get rid of the aches and enjoy coffee – why shouldn’t I imbibe whenever I want? As addictions go – it isn’t that bad. I could be addicted to so many other things, shoes, clothes, shopping, food, drugs, alcohol etc.

 

But it’s good to know that I could stop cold turkey and survive if I ever wanted to again. Not that I foresee that happening any time soon.

What a difference a day makes….

For the two weeks that I was off coffee I had no energy. I dragged myself around and felt that my get up and go had got up and went.

 

Yesterday I had a cup of coffee and I had energy to clean house, I got all the laundry done after a cup of coffee today, met up with friends for lunch, and still had energy left to clean and cook when I got home. Not quite Lynette on Ritalin, but close 😉 Last week this would have been very tough.

 

Maybe caffeine is a wonder-drug, but it isn’t speed or amphetamines, and it seems a harmless way to get stuff accomplished in my day. I don’t regret falling off the decaffeinated wagon!

 

We had a tweet-up today which was so fun. EmetElisheva  and KosherAcademic  and I all met up at the Cavendish Mall for an hour, over poutine.  I had never physically met KosherAcademic before, neither had EmetElisheva. We all three are bloggers and we tweet too – I connected with KA over FaceBook through KvetchingEditor, and EE and I have been friends for years, EE and KA connected through Twitter. It’s a small world, this blogosphere of ours.

 

Girlies – I had a lot of fun – I look forward to meeting up again soon.

Proud of myself

I was up before the alarm. Actually sneezed in my sleep and it woke me. My throat was on fire and my nose running. No fever, so really no excuse to stay in bed and cancel my jog. But it was so toasty warm in bed and very cold outside it.

 

Nope, I dragged myself out of bed, got dressed for my run – wrapped a scarf tightly around my neck, put on legwarmers (yes I still own some) and a warm hat, shoved a Halls in my mouth and off I trotted.

 

I really didn’t think I would be this committed – but in my head my reward for jogging is my sole cup of coffee in the day. No jog – no coffee. It balances out…

 

On our way back we came across the neighbourhood skunk – euw what a disgusting creature. But apparently it is always out foraging at 6 am. We just stayed well away.

 

Came home, set up the coffee, started waking up the kidlets, processing them through the shower (best to do it while they are still sleepy – they can’t complain too much) and still my coffee wasn’t ready. Ah, forgot to plug it in. Maybe a sign from above not to imbibe? Nah. I plugged that baby in! Ah the sweet nectar of coffee. Mmm mmm good!

 

Now I am caffeinated, Advil cold and sinus-ed,  and ready to take on the day….woohoo….laundry here I come!!

Hi, My Name is Hadassah…..

….and it has been over a week since my last coffee. I must confess that when he wasn’t looking, I took a sip of the KoD’s coffee (and one when he was looking). Sorry Dude. I have sniffed countless cups of other people’s coffees (The Queen of Stars can bear witness) but have not succumbed to a whole cup of the caffeinated stuff. On Friday, driving down to Baltimore, we stopped at a kosher Dunkin Donuts and I decided to try a decaf latte. Even that hurt my poor little tummy. But it tasted good and I felt like I was cheating but I know I wasn’t.

 

I have also cut out caffeinated carbonated drinks, in fact all carbonated drinks. It seems that in my old age my stomach just cannot handle any of these yummy beverages. I wonder what else is in store for me as I age. Sigh. I am only 36….I am too young to be getting old!

 

KoD said that there was a coffee product on the market in the States that was supposed to be gentler on the stomach – does anyone have any idea what this is or where it is available? This is something I might try….but we can’t seem to find it anywhere.

 

I am going to keep away from caffeine for now – so stop tempting me, people. Everyone around me needs to give up caffeine too. K? KoD – you willing to do this, for me? Hmm, maybe I should make a royal edict…..

DAY TWO – no coffee

 

 

Ok I slept better last night than I have in months, and I am wondering if it has anything at all to do with having no caffeine in my system. I woke up NOT craving the warm goodness of a cuppa joe – quite alert too (for me anyway lol).

 

I hadn’t told the kids that I was quitting because I wanted to see if they would notice the difference in me, also last time I quit they convinced me to take it up again because I was easier to deal with when caffeinated.

 

I am not quite bright eyed and bushy tailed, but am getting there!! The tea actually doesn’t taste too bad this morning.

 

The worst part of the day yesterday was mid-afternoon – I felt extremely sluggish and my body was telling me that one cup of coffee wouldn’t kill me. I am proud to say I resisted. Nothing like housework to keep a mind off a craving.

DAY ONE – no coffee

 

 

It has been 25 hours and 20 minutes since I last imbibed, since I last had a caffeine hit. I am doing ok. I had tea this morning. My stomach didn’t like that either, but I think it was still thinking I was drinking coffee. My hands are shaking badly – guess it is a good job I am not a surgeon. No headache yet which is surprising but I am popping Advil prophylactically.

 

I looked at my coffee maker this morning and I felt it reach towards me. I slapped it back. It took so much willpower but I did it. I thought about brewing coffee just so that I could smell it…..but I don’t think my willpower could have survived that!

 

I can do this……I can!

2008 retrospective

I started writing a look back at the year that was, but the first draft ended up being a play by play of the guys that I dated. I should be blushing here, right, but I will not. I was on a quest to find my prince charming and I guess that was my main focus of this year. Those of you who read all the Frumster Files  (including the deleted ones) know a lot of what I experienced.

 

After many disappointments, and some close calls, this year on Rosh Hashannah my davenning was to ask Hashem to send me what he felt was right for me at this point in my life. I honestly didn’t think He would be so quick in responding.

 

As I look back on 2008 I want to thank every guy that I dated / went out with / conversed and emailed with. You were all a necessary step on my road to finding my King of Diamonds. Ok a few of you I would like to have stepped completely over or on you, but I didn’t get that choice. I learnt something from each and everyone of you – some things about men in general, some things about myself, my likes and dislikes, my preferences, what I will or will not settle for. There were a couple of you that were really close to be the One – but you didn’t make the final cut….oh well, such is life.  (At this point I would like to say that I didn’t settle for anything less than the very best – and I am so blessed)

 

This was the year of finding my beshert, my beloved future husband, the King of Diamonds. He proposed in front of my children, with tears sparkling in his eyes…sigh….I love sharing our story – so read it again here.

 

This was also the year in which we celebrated the barmitzvah of our eldest son, together, in true blended family tradition – with everyone getting along and being there for our son’s moment in the spotlight. Read about it here Son – you did me proud and I am so honoured to be your Ima. I still think back fondly to that weekend – such great positive memories. My fave – when you started speaking about me in your speech and your voice broke, and the whole hall cried with you. My chance to speak – well, that was icing on the cake. Read my speech here .

 

This year I took my eldest son to Israel and introduced him to his country. I was so priviliged to be able to do this, and the memories will live on in both of us forever. My prayer at the kotel. Some holiday musings .

 

I started working outside the house this year, I blogged about it here  and while it was a big adjustment, I would not trade it for the world. To have people to converse with during the day, about important matters, and not just about groceries and kids – that’s a priceless experience. And to get paid for it – what a bonus!!

 

I made a bunch of new friends this year and enjoyed “old” friends too– you have enriched my life more than you can ever know. I hope our friendships continue to go from strength to strength.

 

I also started blogging this year. First month of blog here . It has been one of the most rewarding experiences I have had to date. I have always been one to have something to say, and the idea that there are people out there actually interested in what I have to say just continues to blow my mind!

 

I bought a blackberry  and joined the dark side. I started tweeting too – if you haven’t used twitter.com yet – hop on over there and sign up. This has been an invaluable real time tool for me to advertise my blog, to find out what’s going on in the world, and with my own people. Warning –it can be a little bit addictive if you let it. Note to all who asked – I will not be live tweeting my wedding – that’s been done already…thanks SGR for taking that pressure off me!!

 

I gave up coffee three times this year. Every time I was so impressed with myself. I went without coffee for 3 long months at one point. Everyone (except my stomach) is so much happier with me back to drinking my daily caffeine. Some things are just not worth giving up. Caffeine makes me a better mother – it’s the sacrifice I am willing to make. (of course the fact that I love it very much doesn’t hurt ).

 

My message for you all in 2009 is don’t give up on your dream. Sometimes you may have to tweak it a little, refine and reshape – but don’t give up. You never know what life has in store.

 

So my motto for 2009 is this “all will be fine in 2009”.

Bookmark and Share

My Morning Prayer / Ode to coffee

Oh how i love the taste of you
so early in the morn
the shock of your warmth thrills me
it chills me
it stokes the fires within me
The power you hold
Over me is strong and true
How lucky you are
that I wake craving YOU
You are my first thought
Upon arising
The taste of you is always surprising
To sense your fire
Coursing through my veins
Is my ultimate desire
My lips surround you
In a velvet kiss
Awaiting that feeling
Of sheer caffeinated bliss.