A little miffed, I am a little miffed I tell you. I went to pick up Prince ChatterBox from school and bumped into his teacher. I haven’t seen her in a while – at first grade level they allow the kids to leave the building without supervision.
“Ohmigawd what happened to you?” she screeched.
“You lost so much weight” she continued.
She said it in such a way that I felt that I looked as if I was at death’s door G-d forbid. I happen to know I look healthy and am a healthy weight. Shouldn’t lose, shouldn’t gain, like Goldilocks’ porridge, I am just right.
But I came home and looked at myself in the mirror just to make sure there wasn’t something I was missing. Then I told myself to snap out of it, that it’s pure jealousy, plain and simple. This lady may have been trying for years to lose a bit of weight and my success (now at 50lbs lost since my heaviest 2 years ago) reminds her of her failure.
And let me just add this to you skinny-minny wannabes out there. Thin maybe “in” but you have to be fit too and take care of yourself. I am working on that. Far from perfect on that. KoD is trying to get me to work out as is Lady LockNLoad – I am not thrilled with the hard work it will involve, but I would rather have Michelle Obama’s arms than these sticks off my shoulders. Six pack abs would be nice too – but even tho I want some definition, I don’t want to lose my womanly softness….(I want it all, I want it all, I want it all and I want it now…)
Why are we always looking at other peoples bodies to judge our own?
Sometimes it’s the comments that aren’t premeditated that hurt the most. Recently, being the only slim person at a table with some people of larger size, I felt very insulted. I was offered dessert after eating a full meal, and I politely declined. So this guy who I hardly knew says “what are you? Anorexic or something?” and carried on with his life commentary (totally inappropriate table talk, but that was who he was). It wasn’t even his house or his table.
What if his assessment had been true? Wouldn’t that have hurt even more? Part of me wanted to say to him, why yes, I am anorexic – something a pig like you can’t ever understand because you have never met a food you don’t like, never said no to the fifth dessert.
No one, and again I am making this point, would dare to say “oh you’re having another piece of cake? Aren’t you already morbidly obese? Don’t you think you should stop?” But because thin is in people think they can joke about anorexia and get away with it. Obesity and Anorexia are both illnesses that can prove fatal, and neither should be joked about. If I decline dessert it’s because I am full. Not because I am obsessing about the number I will next see on the scale. I am slim, yes, and I guess that makes some people jealous, but do not mock my size, for I am starting to get sick of it.
When I was heavier, and I was for a while, there were barely any size comments – I remember one lady commenting, tho, on how she thought I had had a boob job. Gaining 40+ pounds in 2 months will add dimensions in places there were none before. But no one dared mention weight in my presence. They knew that a formerly skinny person who had been slim all her life and now was seven sizes bigger than her original self would have been upset to hear that. I dropped the 40+ (and a little more) and now I am fair game?
People, do not comment on size. It can be so hurtful. The only time its acceptable is if you are truly worried about a friend’s health – whether they be too large or too small, and then, please, choose your words appropriately. People of all shapes and sizes are vulnerable to size-ist remarks. Don’t say anything to anyone you wouldn’t want to hear said to you.
These days it is so politically incorrect to call someone fat. But apparently totally ok to call someone thin, even someone you don’t even know that well. Maybe thin people feel discriminated against? Maybe inside every thin person is a fat person waiting to break out? How did it become ok to tell someone they look amazing because they lost weight? Doesn’t that imply that they looked like crap to start off with? No one would dare go up to someone and say “wow it looks like you have gained weight since the last time I saw you, tell me your secret” – so why is the opposite deemed to be ok? Why are thin people held up as the yardstick for what passes as beauty in this world? Why is it that people’s size actually matters? Isn’t it what’s inside a person that counts? These days you can buy a ladies dress in a size ZERO – what does that mean, that the person wearing it doesn’t really exist? Come on people!!!! Lets stop being so shallow and fickle and judgemental, and look at the real person, look in their heart and soul.