I am asked very often how I manage the long 6 hour drive to see my KoD. It’s such a shlepp, how am I able to do it every other weekend without being exhausted. Good question.
My answer is always that no one is forcing me to do it, I drive the 333 miles because I want to spend time with my husband, and it isn’t often possible for him to drive up here because of work constraints. Knowing that he is there waiting at the other end with arms open wide, well, that gives me the impetus to get on the road. And, yes, once we get our visas this long distance shlepping will be a thing of the past.
Those 6 hours on the road there, and 6 back, give me time to think and to meditate. I shall be honest, the first hour from Montreal is always “let me get through the border with no hassles”. Once I am through it’s a straight road all the way through the Adirondacks, past Lake George and Albany, through the Catskills. When the roads are clear, it’s an awesome chance for me to just let my mind start putting in order all the little bits and pieces that have been bothering me, or just need to be filed in the right place in my mind.
For much of the way cell phone reception is very poor or spotty at best, so I know no one can reach me. It’s like being in my own private bubble. No one needs me, no one is calling my name, no one needs Ima to come help with anything… this is totally MY time. I often will put aside issues during the week, in order that I can totally think them thru on the drive – no interruptions, no distractions. I talk to God a lot during this time, too. I meditate. I come up with subjects for blog posts or books and articles. I have come up with many solutions to many issues on these long drives.
Initially the drive was torture. But I have been doing it for over a year and once the car hits the open road, you get into the zone. Long distance drivers know exactly what I am talking about. When I arrive at our home in NY – I am tired and my back hurts, but I am mentally refreshed too! It’s like I arrive with all my worries filed correctly under the right emotions, leaving me free to just be with the KoD without extra stuff crowding its way in. That last half hour knowing I am almost there – nothing in the world beats that excitement and anticipation at seeing my husband. My heartbeat speeds up as the car slows down. That reunion at the end of the 6 hours makes it all worthwhile.
KoD – only 77 hours….not that I am counting or anything!!!
In the Pink 
Are you trying to get a U.S. visa, or is he trying to get a Canadian visa?
welcome to the blog, anon! we are waiting for US Visas.
hadassah, you do it b/c it’s important to you & it’s what you must do in order to see your KoD. of course it is exhausting but it is worth it. i know many couples especially in israel who commute between israel & the US every couple of weeks. how do they manage? beats me b/c it’s not something that i would want to do but it works for them b/c it allows them to achieve their dream of living in the Holy Land & making a decent living. i guess we all do what we have to do. lucky for you, this Mtl/NY commute is not going to be long-term but i sure as heck know it’s been long enough :)!
My hubby used to make the commute to Montreal while we were dating. He runs his own business, so having those few hours to himself when the reception was terrible was like having a vacation. He would sit back, smoke a cigar and cruise his way up to me, totally relaxed when he arrived.
Now that we are married, and I have a green card, I get to help with the driving.
I will never forget the first couple of times we drove together. He was like a kid in a candy store, so happy to have my company, and knowing that he was taking me home to NY, not leaving me in Canada any longer.
Z! did you grow up in canada? i lived there from age 7-17 (the formative years).
Yes, that is where I got to know Hadassah. I grew up in Ottawa and moved to Montreal for University. I liked the community so much I stayed there until I met my bashert, (like Hadassah) on Frumster.
and then you moved away….
Batya, did you make the move to the States on your own or with your family?
oh cool! TG for frumster but only sometimes (from what i hear)!
Batya – i know 3 other couples who met and married on Frumster. and are happy BH. but yeah…..you gots to be careful…
my parents were originally american & moved to mtl for parnassah purposes (my dad’s a rabbi/teacher) & they have stayed there ever since…i left as soon as i graduated HS (1 year in israel & then on to stern college in the US where i obtained my BA & pre-wed degrees!) TG, i met my hubby in my junior year of college & we got married a month after i graduated & the rest is history…
Boruch Hashem that you are physically able to drive all that way, and that you were able to get a vehicle to do it in. Also, it is good that you do not work out of the home, so you don’t have to worry about missing time from work. Hope you get your visas soon so you will stop all your shlepping, I don’t think you will miss all that driving once you finally move here. especially in the snow (was flurrying today!)